The Duffel Bag
by raincaster
Summary: Companion story to Prediction and Instinct, probably a good idea if that is read first. Jake's mother returns home with a camo duffel bag filled with her son's journal, pictures, and video logs from Pandora. And she is going to find out her son's story.
1. Chapter 1

Mrs. Sully rested on her queen sized bed, staring at the unzipped camo duffel bag that sat next to her on the deep red bedspread. She had just left the space port after she had read Jake's letter, asking her two companions to excuse her -- she needed to be alone in the comfort of her home. Dried tear streaks ran down her face from the fact that her baby wasn't going to come home to her… he had decided to stay light years away from her on some distant planet with some distant aliens that she knew little of. She looked up at her TV, then down at the duffel bag, and then peered into the bag to spot the journal and video logs… Jake's story was hidden within them.

She didn't understand why he had chosen not to come home, but Jake's letter had said that the bag had all the explanations. And somehow she knew that it was for her eyes only; not only because it was private, but because it would tell of what really had happened on Pandora…'classified' information. When she had turned on the TV earlier, the news caster had been ranting about the RDA failure and exile out of the planet (nothing about Jake though). Apparently the Na'vi had driven all the humans out, but there were holes in the story. How did the most powerful company with the most powerful military at their side lose to naïve natives who had bows and arrows? And how – much less _why_ – would Jake stay with creatures that obviously strongly disliked his race? His letter had said that he couldn't leave that which he loved, but didn't he love her? What hold did the Na'vi have over her son? And what did her son have to do with the RDA's failure, which his letter had subtly implied?

Well, Mrs. Sully was going to find out. As soon as she gathered the courage to look into the duffel bag once and start going through Jake's story.


	2. The Drawing of the Na'vi

Taking out the hardcover journal, Mrs. Sully carefully opened up the cover and took out the loose papers that were stored there. Some of which were drawing that Jake had done. She froze, looking down at those. It had been a while since she had been able to see any of Jake's adult drawings and writings. One in particular caught her eye.

It was of a beautiful Na'vi girl. Amber eyes with green around the dark irises stared back at her, full of expression. Youth, wisdom, ferocity and gentleness shone out of those eyes. Her lithe body was posed upon a dragon like creature in flight and a bright, carefree smile shone on her face. Underneath the drawing was Jake's normal rat scratch handwriting which read _Neytiri._ Suddenly grabbing for Jake's letter, she read where she had seen the name before… "_I can't have my human body separating me from what I've fallen so in love with, this land, this People… Neytiri…_" Did that mean what she thought it meant…?

Grinning now, Mrs. Sully turned to the first date in the journal eager to find out more about this Neytiri. She had told Jake before he had left to perhaps find a nice, pretty scientist from the AVTR program and finally settle down, but she had been half way teasing him. So to see that he might have actually followed part of her instructions – as always half way listening – amused her greatly. Sure, he'd fall in love, but with a wildly beautiful and fierce Na'vi, which was just as opposite as Mrs. Sully had ever foreseen with any future daughters in laws – if that was indeed who Neytiri to her. Typical Jake. Despite not being what she would have expected, Mrs. Sully liked her immediately. She couldn't explain what it was about Jake's drawing that drew her into Neytiri's character and spirit, but it was as beautiful as her appearance. Even with all the good feelings though she couldn't help but feel a stab of resentment. She had kept her only living son from returning to her after all. So mixed emotions on the Na'vi who might be her daughter in law…

She needed to get started. Finally Mrs. Sully looked down onto the first dated page and read:

_May 1, 2154 _

_Well, I'm here on Pandora… doing science. Tom would have a huge laugh if he saw me. _

_ I'm really suppose to record all this down on those video logs… but those are for the company's eyes too. And quite frankly, how I feel is none of the RDA's damn business. Oh, I'll do them of course; it's a requirement. And Max says that recording all your observations is good science and Norman says it'll keep me sane for the next six years… But this I can almost guarantee secrecy if it says… well a secret. No one writes in journals anymore after all, not with all this high tech gear._

_ I saw my avatar today. It looks like Tom. It was weird seeing his face on something so alien. It has grown so huge since I last 'saw' it… it was about the size of a head of a pin and has now grown into a ten feet blue tailed Na'vi in the six years I was in cryo sleep. Though it's still floating around in one huge tube, attached to it by some sort of cord. Kind of like a fetus in the womb. Max said we'll be able to take them out as soon as tomorrow and I can't wait. I have almost forgotten what it felt life to have working legs. _

_ My lovely boss, Dr. Grace Augustine doesn't seem thrilled about me being here. She actually said quite bluntly that she wanted Thomas Sully, the PhD. I'm sorry that his death is such an "inconvenience" for her. _ _No one wishes more than I do that he was here, living his dream. Tom had talked about Pandora for just about as long as we began talking. But he isn't and I came in his place. Tom was the scientist though; me, I'm just some jarhead going someplace that he'll probably regret. _

Giving a small sad smile at her son's last words in the entry, Mrs. Sully couldn't help but chuckle. Famous last words. He probably had jinxed himself into staying right then and there with that attitude.

For the sake of keeping up with the time line, she dug into the bag and found a video log with the same date as the journal entry and popped it in to her television. Soon Jake was staring back at her reciting off his name, date and location, looking as though he wasn't quite sure what he was doing.

_ The idea is every driver is matched to his own avatar --__so their nervous systems are in tune. Or something. Which is why they offered me this gig, because I can link with Tommy's avatar, which was insanely expensive... _

Mrs. Sully watched as Jake paused and looked away from the camera to face an older man in a long white lab coat and a man about Jake's age working beside him from behind.

_Is this right? I just say whatever?_

_Yeah. _The younger scientist replied._ You just need to get in the habit of documenting everything -- what you see, what you feel -- it's all part of the science. Good science starts with good observation._

_Right..._Jake muttered, clearly going with whatever was said. He turned back to the camera _So, whatever. Here I am. Doing science…Never been in a lab before._

Mrs. Sully couldn't get rid of the grin on her face. She watched as the older man with the brown beard turned to talk to her son saying, _Log off. It's time to meet your boss for the next five years. _Jake nodded and his hand out towards her, clearly to reach for a button and the log went blank.

That hadn't really told her what she hadn't known or could have probably guessed already but she was only beginning. She glanced at the Neytiri drawing again and picked it up and started to look through the other papers.


	3. The photo and the colonel

The second picture that caught her attention acted as a bookmark for Jake's second journal entry. It was a photograph of him in front of his avatar. His face was mainly facing away from her, staring into the large tube in which the large hybrid floated in, attached by a thick cord. The lighting was a soft but strong blue which only highlighted the alien features of the avatar. Yet seeing Jake and his avatar side by side made Mrs. Sully realize how alike an avatar was to its driver. It held both of her sons' facial features and with an acting imagination she could see it smiling and frowning like them. And it really freaked her out. Seeing Jake and Tom together had been hard enough at times. They had separate personalities and had led totally different lives, yet they had mimicked each others' expressions and emotions when she had least expected it. So imagining this avatar which was already held so much of their looks acting like Jake … it was really hard; it was mind boggling. It had been made with Tom's DNA but Jake was going to be the mind and soul behind the cobalt skin. Still trying to wrap her mind around the fact, Mrs. Sully started to read the next journal entry.

_May 2, 2154_

_I walked. I ran… Did I mention I finally was able to stand on my own legs yet?_

_Well, technically it was the avatar's legs… but those count as mine now – technically. _

_I can never find the right words to describe the feeling of doing something that people had told me I would never do again. Amazing perhaps? Enlightening? Freeing? _

_Though I felt somewhat like a newborn giraffe might have after it was born – not only did I have a pair of limbs that I hadn't used in about seven years or more, I also had an extra five feet plus of them with a tail that had a mind of its own. The doctors that were tending to me weren't so pleased with me… I ran out on them. But could they really blame me? I was RUNNING! I could feel the grass and dirt under my feet. I actually stopped for a moment, enjoying the dirt's feel. One can't appreciate that until one isn't able to do it. Norman had chased after me and I ignored him. I now have an escape. I now have freedom. This was unexpected… I knew I would enjoy this feeling of control but I hadn't expected me craving it, soaking it in. Even Grace seemed impressed with the 'jarhead dropout.' _

Mrs. Sully had to wipe away threatening tears in her eyes. How she wished she could have seen Jake walking again. He had been so depressed since Venezuela…

_It was a real let down to unlink. I was back to being a useless paraplegic former marine._

The tears won and she allowed them to roll down her face. OhJake_._

_Colonel Quartitch, head of security, wanted to see me today. So Trudy, one of the pilots led me to where he was and appointed me to my station on the Samson for tomorrow's flight out. It's great to be back in action. _

_As it ended up, Quartitch wanted a spy... there really isn't any other word for it and I really don't like it. He wants me to somehow get in with the Na'vi and gather and pass on information to him and the CEO Selfridge. _

Mrs. Sully pause, eyes wide, and read that again. _He wants me to somehow get in with the Na'vi and gather and pass on information to him and the CEO Selfridge… a spy..._

"Jacob Anderson Sully, don't tell me you said yes," she muttered angrily under her breath. He wouldn't, he couldn't… she read on.

_I don't like the idea of deceiving Grace; I had just gotten her respect after all. But then the Colonel offered me that one thing that I know that he knew I wouldn't refuse… he offered me my legs back… as in my human legs._

Quartitch was on Mrs. Sully's last nerve already and she hadn't read more than two short paragraphs about him. Anger swelled up in her at the man for taking advantage of her son in such a way. Disappointment and sorrow filled her as she recalled all that she already knew. She tried to tell herself that it had all worked out in the end; Jake had been happy in his letter. But she realized now that there would be some sort of pain in between all of that, some sort of price had been paid. Jake_…_

_I said yes. And I have tried to tell myself that it was more than just getting my real legs back. It was for all the soldiers out there getting themselves killed. The more we knew about the Na'vi the more likely we could fight them to defend ourselves right? I have a duty as a fellow soldier to help in any way I can… it's not just the legs. Or so I tell myself._

_Or so I tell myself…_ Mrs. Sully read the line again. "So don't do it." She whispered, knowing perfectly well that her advice was useless now and she was only talking to a notebook. How could he have had agreed to such a thing, even with the incentive? She had taught him better… had he really been that bitter and depressed? How had she missed that? She knew that it turned out alright at the end but now she looked down at the journal with brand new eyes. What was in those next pages?

"_I can't have my human body separating me from what I've fallen so in love with, this land, this People… Neytiri…_" and yet he had originally walked among them as a spy. And Mrs. Sully somehow knew that there were serious consequences… probably dealing with why the RDA would speak poorly of him as Jake had implied. She looked at the photo of Jake and his avatar, than at the drawing of Neytiri. And with a sigh, she turned to the next entry reading…

_May 4, 2154_

_Took me forever to get her name…_


	4. First meetings

Mrs. Sully gave a small grin as she read that line again. "_Took me forever to get her name…" _Maybe this was where she would get to meet this Neytiri. She hoped so anyway.

_I had gotten separated from Grace and Norman while we were out in our avatars. They were off doing their science thing and I had a whole new jungle to explore. Sadly, that same jungle has a whole bunch of six legged animals to run into. First a rhino like creature gets pissed at me for messing with these cool orange spiral plants (Grace told me their names but I don't remember) then a Thantor (looks kind of like a giant panther) decides that I'm on the menu. And once I escape from the Thantor by jumping off a cliff into water I'm attacked by a pack of viper wolves and I have lost all of my supplies ... all I had really was a newly carved and ignited torch. _

Mrs. Sully read all that again and shook her head. Typical Jake, getting into as much trouble as possible without even trying. What an adventurous first day out in a new world. But she frowned, thinking and asking herself where Grace and Norman were during all this; shouldn't they have helped him? That had been her son getting attacked by strange six legged creatures!

_I tried to defend myself from one that leapt up at me, but it ended up stiffening with a cry of pain. And I saw an arrow sticking out from it. I was torn between relief that I wasn't facing these things alone and pure alarm at the fact that there was someone around shooting poison dart arrows. And that's when she leapt into the picture. Literally. In one fluid movement a young Na'vi woman appeared landing on the ground and released another arrow that was positioned in her bow. Damn it was impressive. Her grace and ferocity reminded me of the Thantor that I had just escaped from. All I could do was watch. If I tried to help, I had a feeling I would be in the way. The girl hissed at the remaining pack, warning them away. They fled. Wish it would be that easy for me…_

_ She muttered under her breath in what must have been Na'vi, because I couldn't understand a word of it. And then she tossed my torch into the water. Despite my protests. She just ignored me and leaned over the dead creatures and started to mutter more Na'vi. Her tone was like that of a prayer. I knew she had little chance of speaking English, but I attempt to thank her anyway and I reached out to catch her attention… and get slapped on the head with that lovely little bow she was holding. And she spoke English – accented and angry English, but very clear nevertheless. _

Well, this was certainly an interesting first meeting. Mrs. Sully wasn't quite sure rather to be amused at the fact that Jake had had to be saved or had been hit by a bow when he had attempted to touch her.

_To sum up what she said, she basically blamed me for the things attacking me and having her kill them to save me; backwards right? She went off on a tangent too… I basically kept a close watch on her bow that was too close for comfort and tried to sound soothing at the same time. If felt like calming down a pissed off teenager (which she looks about eighteen… nineteen maybe). So when I asked why she did save me she gave me an answer I didn't expect. Instead she said I had a strong heart, no fear. I had expected more along the lines of how pathetic I looked, but I took the compliment._

Smiling, Mrs. Sully read the one phrase again: "_she said I had a strong heart, no fear." _That sounded like Jake alright… how had the girl noticed right away though? She had to be pretty special. She read on.

_But I guess she has a talent of complimenting someone and insulting them in one breath because then she added that I was stupid, ignorant and acted like in her words 'a baby.' And she started to leave. And I followed; I had had enough of trying to be eaten by weird animals for the night. So I'm trying to introduce myself to make her comfortable and she's trying to ditch me when_

The writing stopped there. Frowning Mrs. Sully turned to the next page. On it was a new entry.

_May 4, 2154 cont._

_ Grace stole my journal and ordered me to do a log and stuff some food into me. So I guess I'll finish my last one and be grateful that Grace isn't the colonel…_

She would watch the log later, after she finished what happened between Jake and this Na'vi girl.

_It has to be quick since village life for the Na'vi start early and Neytiri would be pissed if I woke up late for training (she's already unhappy about tutoring me as is)._

_ So I'm trying to keep up with Neytiri (the girl who I hadn't gotten her name quite yet) when all of a sudden these bright white floating seeds—and I mean A LOT of these seeds—land all over my body. Which is freaky weird, and Neytiri thought so to… actually she looked like she was in—awe. Almost fearful. And next thing I know she's ordering me to come. And so I follow her once more just this time with her permission. I decide to ask for her and start to when I'm ambushed by a passing hunting party. Neytiri saves me (again) and the hunt party's leader grabs me by the braid (that hurt and I think he knew it) and I'm led to their home, which is called Hometree. And it's one BIG tree. _

_Anyway, the gathering clan gave me a bunch of weird looks, and the chief (which I learned was Neytiri's father) was trying to decide to kill me or not when this other Na'vi (Neytiri's mother, some sort of spiritual leader) came and inspected me. And she came to the conclusion that I was to learn their ways with Neytiri as my guide. Neytiri threw a miniature fit. _

Oh dear, it was clearly an interesting first meeting with the in-laws too. And they were leaders of the clan, which would make Neytiri a Pandora version of Pocahontas. Mrs. Sully was amused as well as surprised.

_I finally got a chance to ask for her name when she led me away to bandage a cut on my arm. At first she said it really fast, and then when I asked for it again, she said it really slow, making sure to pronounce each and every sound. Like I was the baby she accused me of being. I had a feeling she was trying to provoke me so I just ignored it. Oh well, at least I got her name: Neytiri. Different, but beautiful. It fits her quite well. _

_When I unlink, Grace was amazed at where my avatar is. Can't say I blame her; I'm pretty astounded myself. I went to see Quartitch and Selfridge and got yet another job. Apparently they want to mine Hometree, but Neytiri's clan won't move and they want someone to convince them to move or else it's going to be all force._

Mrs. Sully frowned once more; they didn't ask him… it was too much already that he was being asked to spy…

_They want me to find iron out all the wrinkles between our two races and negotiate terms for them leaving Hometree… in a time limit of three months. I have three months to learn a whole new way of life and convince a clan to move from their home that has been theirs for… well forever. _

_So to sum up my situation. I'm a former marine avatar driver acting as a spy, negotiator, and ambassador. My lovely young tutor Neytiri clearly distrusts just about everything about me (can't say I blame her considering…) and there's something that I don't know about that was the cause of all this tension and distrust between the humans and the Na'vi that I have a feeling would explain a lot to me, but no one is talking about it. I'm working under a three month deadline to relearn life as I know it or a whole clan's home is going to be timber and ash._

_What the hell have I gotten myself into?_

Reaching out for the video logs, Mrs. Sully couldn't help but think the same exact thing: what had Jake gotten into?


	5. Beginning training

_This is Jake Sully… the date is May 4, 2154 and the time is eleven hundred. Location is the lab…_

Mrs. Sully waited as the video log Jake said the necessities and then laid down as he started to talk about his day.

_After being chased and hunted by some of the native wild life, I managed to convince a native to let my avatar stay in her village, the same one that the corporation needs for mining. They want to study me, teach me their ways. _

Jake gave a small smiled as he added, _some of the Na'vi were quite curious to see an human walking among them when I arrived… it felt like the first day at a high school and I'm the new kid no one knows about and are uncertain of how 'cool' I will be. It's been a while since I've had that happen. Though some of them have seemed to have made up their minds; a male roughly about my age tried to kill and challenge me a few times._

Mrs. Sully's face fell at that; why did she have a feeling this wasn't the only time Jake was going to have trouble with this said male? She didn't even know his name yet!

_Anyway, the same Na'vi woman who brought me to the village is going to 'train' me, teach me all that she knows. She doesn't seem too thrilled about it either. But hey, here goes nothing. A little Na'vi 101 … I guess I'm going native. Figuratively, of course._

The video went blank and Mrs. Sully returned to the journal.

_May 7, 2154_

_Neytiri isn't the most patient mentor in the world. She gave me a mini tour of Hometree, switching off and on from English to Na'vi hoping that I'd pick up on words along the way. She gives off annoyed sighs when she realizes that I'm not exactly keeping up with her. She continues this method however when we venture out into the wild and she just talks. I have to say, she may be fun to annoy (and I'm not even trying) but I really admire her for her determination to make me 'get it.' Her voice isn't horrible to listen to for hours on end either (unlike certain high school teachers and boot camp drill sergeants). It's beautifully exotic… more so because of the passion in her voice then her foreign accent. Though she is less than happy about sharing her world with me, it is clear that she is going to show me at its best and fullest. If she is forced to show me her life, than she's going to force me to see it through her eyes. And it's clear that her world is her life, her soul. I can just tell it from her voice. And the teenager that I saw that first night she saved me disappears… she talks and acts so much like an adult._

Mrs. Sully smiled. It was nice that Neytiri was doing her best with Jake… no matter her first impressions.

_Then Neytiri tried to get me to ride a _Pa'li _which is a six legged horse. Well, I bond with it (which means I connect part of my nervous system that is hanging in my braid with the horse's). Really cool. I can feel the creature breathe. I can feel its heartbeat. I feel like I'm the creature itself. But for some reason, none of them are particularly willing to give me a try. I keep getting bucked off. Tsu'tey (the male that really doesn't want me around) gets a laugh every time._

You could 'bond' with other creatures? Mrs. Sully's eyes sparkled in excitement. That was the neatest thing. She had had a rescue horse when she had been younger… it would have been neat to connect their beings like that… she tried to picture what it must feel like to no longer be just your own being… and she couldn't. It just wasn't possible. 

_Grace suggested I make and keep a dictionary to help both Neytiri and myself with the language barrier. So here goes nothing…_

_**Kelutrel**_** – **_Hometree_

_**Ioang – **__animal_

_**Tompa –**__ rock_

_**Tsawke **__– sun_

_**Utral**__ – tree_

_**Tangek **__– trunk_

_**Vul **__– branch_

_**Hufwe **__– wind_

_**Atxkxe **__– land_

_**Taw –**__ sky_

_**Trr**__ – day …_

The teacher came out in Mrs. Sully as she read over these words and tried to pronounce a few of them. He hadn't added a pronunciation key or anything! She shook her head and skipped what was left of the words. He had written more after the list… almost as an after though.

_I talked with Quartitch and Selfridge today. They want me to get accurate measurements of Hometree's structure. How I'm going to do without the proper instruments I have no clue… but I'll think of something. _

She snorted disdainfully. Yes Jake would think of something with the colonel's influence hanging over his head. He just had to mention the colonel…

Turning the page she read on:

_May 9, 2154_

_Grace moved our avatar crew to the Hallelujah Mountains. I guess they're these floating mountains that you can only find on Pandora. They're like something you'd see a surrealism artist do… __One might wonder, what does hold them up? Grace explained it to me -- some kind of maglev effect because unobtanium is a superconductor, or something. At least somebody understands it. Just not me. _

_Though this is going to make it harder to contact the colonel… something tells me that is Grace's goal._

Mrs. Sully had a feeling that she'd like Dr. Grace Augustine for some reason (despite her initial reaction to Jake). Grace could be Jake's conscience while he was there. It was usually her that made Jake see common sense but in her absence the intelligent and blunt scientist was good enough.

_Norman is acting jealous… I guess it's understandable. He did train for three years or more for this and this jarhead brother of his friend just stumbles in and suddenly he's "cultural ambassador." Or that's what he said anyway. I can't help the clan's choices though. I just go with the flow. _

_Well, I got to link up. Neytiri is going to show me something 'special.' Whatever that means._

**AN: Yes, I know it's still short. I was just trying to get the beginning done and out of the way. Now though I think is the key chuck of the training is coming up and I plan on expanding more on that in the next and upcoming chapters. Thanks for sticking with me!**


	6. The First Month

_ May 12, 2154_

_ Neytiri showed me her mountain banshee, which the Na'vi call _ikrans_. What a fierce and magnificent creature… reminds me of the dragons that I would read about in fantasy novels or the ancient __Pterodactyl flying across the __Cretaceous __Period. Neytiri is clearly proud of her mount, which she fondly calls Seze. She explained to me that an _ikran_ only had one rider for its life once the bond was made, unlike a _Pa'li. _Mount and rider chose each other… however that works. I must have looked as excited as I felt, because when I asked when I would get a chance to choose one, Neytiri smiled this annoyingly knowing smile and answered simply, __"when you are ready."_

_ Then with a cry, she mounted and flew into the air, clearly happy and carefree. __ I watched transfixed on the sight. Damn that looks like fun. She teased me by directing Seze into a swooping flyby, and I ducked just out of instinct. _

Beneath his entry he had sketched an _ikran_. It indeed looked like a cross between a dragon and a pterodactyl, with a wide wing span from the spine to the edge of the page. There was light shading work with colored pencil done over the graphite, the bright greens and blues reminding her of animal color schemes that she might have seen on the rare jungle creatures of Earth. Bright for a clear warning of danger, but soft enough so that she knew that they weren't the most dangerous out there. Mrs. Sully grinned and looked at Neytiri's drawing again. Happy and carefree as she rode with the wind, Jake had captured it perfectly.

Mrs. Sully took out a video log of Jake's of a later date and pushed it in the television. Her son appeared in front of her, his blue eyes showed clear exhaustion. Jake looked behind him and spoke to an older woman with bright red hair looking through a microscope.

_Do I have to do this? I need some rack._

The read head looked up from the microscope and scowled. _No now,_ she ordered_ when it's fresh._

_Yeah yeah…_ Judging by her son's look, Mrs. Sully was guessing that the woman was Dr. Augustine. Jake turned back to the camera. _The days are starting to blur together. The language is a bitch, but I figure it's like field-stripping a weapon. Repetition. Repetition._

Only Jake would make such an analogy.

_Neytiri has a nickname for me..._skxawng,_ which is Na'vi for moron. But her attitude is slowly improving towards me; I haven't gotten so many glares or annoyed hits in the forehead as often lately… and those are mainly in the language lessons. _

Mrs. Sully gave a soft chuckle.

_Norman's attitude has improved lately too… It's good he's back on board, but he thinks I'm a _skxawng _too._

Another chuckle. The video log goes blank; short and simple as always. Mrs. Sully returned to the journal, where she knew there was plenty more information. There was yet another Na'vi vocab list:

_**Seyri – **__mouth_

_**Ontu**__ – nose_

_**Mikyun**__ – ears_

_**Nari**__ – eyes_

_**Ireiyo **__– Thank you…_

Mrs. Sully skipped to the main entry.

_May 14, 2154_

_ My feet are getting tougher. I can run farther every day. I have to trust my body to know what to do… with Neytiri it's learn fast or die. I'm running 30 meters above the ground in the trees, trying to keep up with her. It's insane how graceful and fast she is. And she even leaped off the canopy only to have the forest slow down her fall. She looked up at me once she made it to the ground, clearly ordering me to follow her. So like the insane person I am, I did. And it wasn't at all as graceful and efficient as Neytiri's fall, but hey what an adrenaline rush. I wasn't quite sure if Neytiri's surprised expression towards me was surprise that I survived or surprised that I even followed her in the first place. But on the bright side, I think her scare tests are over. She now knows that I'm not going to give up anytime soon and it takes more to get rid of Jake Sully. And strangely enough, she seems to respect that. I certainly got a look of approval at least… very rare with her. So now Neytiri knows I'm willing to know and navigate the land, whatever it takes. Because as far as I'm concerned, I'm a cripple in a box; what have I got to lose?_

Mrs. Sully's face fell with that last statement; oh Jake…

_Neytiri doesn't know that though. She hasn't asked about my human life and I haven't offered to inform her about it. She's just beginning to warm up to me; why strain it with my disability that doesn't affect her?_

She'd accept it though, Mrs. Sully was certain of that. In fact, it might explain a few things to her… she didn't know. Mrs. Sully just wanted to have someone make Jake realize that he didn't have anything to be ashamed about, least not because of that.

_May 15, 2154_

_ I keep staring at the photos of the English school Grace had. Something happened there; I know it. When I saw it the first time out, there were bullet holes in the wall. There was a shooting obviously but why?_

_ The one in particular that is haunting me is the one of a much younger Neytiri with an older Na'vi girl which I know has to be Neytiri's sister. Grace mentioned her very briefly, when I first got into the clan. When I said that I didn't meet this sister, Grace had muttered in low voice, _She's dead._ She didn't mean for me to hear her but I did. Is it too big of a jump to think the two are connected? I can still remember Neytiri's distrustful – and now I realize hateful – gaze on me when we first met, when she saved me from those viper wolves. She had been hurt badly because of humans… is this why? _

_ Every time I have tried to talk to Grace about it, she changes the subject. I don't dare ask Neytiri – I know from experience that it didn't do any good to talk about your sibling's death unless you want to. _

Her mind went blank. Mrs. Sully had to read all that again before she could take in Jake's thoughts and suspicions. She had to put it down and close her eyes to gather back her thoughts. Taking a deep breath, she saw that there was yet another entry…

_May 20, 2154_

_I sweet-talked Mo'at into giving Norm and Grace a hall pass. Now Grace even makes me coffee before link every morning._

_On the training side of things, I'm learning to read the trails, the tracks at the water-hole, the tiniest scents and sounds. It's amazing what a footprint will tell you. _

_Neytiri showed me so much today: A herd of Stumbeast was at the water—hole, with their young protected in the middle. A mother viper wolf with her nursing young, with one feisty cub trying to get out of a tongue bath. A newly born hexapede, trying on its six wobbly legs in an attempt to stand for its first time. So many strange yet wonderful creatures, alien yet familiar. _

The next few journal pages were drawings. Beautiful colored drawing of alien yet familiar creatures that Mrs. Sully could only begin to imagine…

_May 21, 2154_

_I sometimes have no idea what Neytiri is talking about. Like today for an example, she's just standing still in the middle of the forest, except for her ears which are moving with a life of their own._

"_When you hear nothing, you will Hear everything. When you see nothing, you will See everything."_

_Or that's what Neytiri said. Sounds backwards to me… like some paradox that I haven't been able to understand yet. _

The next journal entry was even shorter.

_May 24, 2154_

_**Oel Ngati Kameie**__**. **__It translates into "I see you." But to the Na'vi this has greater meaning then just physically seeing, it means "I see into you; I see your soul."_

_I have no clue exactly what that means, but it keeps coming back to me. Like an annoying truth waiting for me to understand it. _


End file.
